Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Lazy Babies :)
















Rules for would-be grooms

For those who are Married as well as for those who wil get Married…..

Sharing a few thoughts for Would – be grooms

Rule.No.1 - Never compare your mamma's cooking with your wife's! There is no faster way to dig your own grave than that! Please understand that your mom's cooking has the backing of 20 odd years of experience.. ..don't expect that from your wife whose hardly into the process! What if she were to compare your earning capacity with her dad's!!! So shshshhhhh.. ..!!!

Rule.No.2 : Never go out of your way to please the lady with flowers, chocolates and gifts during your engagement period. If ever you do , please follow it up post-wedding too! When you could cover 20kms in 15 minutes when you are engaged just to spend some time with her, how dare you forget her birthday post - marriage, even after you are given the broadest of hints by her! Remember expectations always double...ever heard of them being halved???

Rule.No.3: Do compliment her every now and then, verbally or with gifts! What are those lovely Teddies and Archies gift cards for? Don't sit there like the Lord Of The Rings expecting to be waited upon! Of course she will do it but everyone likes to be appreciated and pampered!!!!

Rule.No.4: This is very important! Sulking or complaining about marriage being a big mistake is a strict NO -NO!! You got into it with your eyes wide open, brimming with enthusiasm!! No one ever pushed you into it! So why this drama now!

Rule.No.5: Be Brave and take your own decisions and stand up by them!!Consult your parents for advice but realise that you are grown up enough to lead your life! Respect your partner's views at all times! Remember she has given up a lot more to make a life with you!!

A Call To The IT Department

Caller: Hi, our printer is not working.

Customer Service: What is wrong with it?

Caller: Mouse is jammed.

Customer Service: Mouse?!?! And how is it related to printer?

Caller: Mmmm.. Wait, I will send a link.
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Sending Now
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Free Haircut

There is this good old barber in some city in Bangalore. One day a florist goes to him for a haircut.

After the cut, he goes to pay the barber, who replies: 'I am sorry, I cannot accept money from you. I am doing a Community Service'. Florist is happy and leaves the shop.

The next morning when the Barber goes to open his shop, there is a Thank you card and a dozen roses waiting at his door.

A Confectioner goes for a haircut and he also goes to pay the Barber. He again refuses to take the money. The Confectioner is happy and leaves the shop.

The next morning when the Barber goes to open his shop, there is a Thank you Card and a dozen Cakes waiting at his door.

A Software Engineer goes for a haircut and he also goes to pay the Barber, who again refuses the money saying that it was a community service.

The next morning when the Barber goes to open his shop, guess what he finds there. .
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Scroll down for the answer






















...a dozen Software engineers waiting for a free haircut. . .

With a printout of an FORWARDED email mentioning about free haircut.

Thought Of The Day - 9th September 2009


“Let your heart guide you. It whispers softly, so listen closely.”

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

A Small Touching Story

A man came home from work late, tired and irritated, to find his 5-year old son waiting for him at the door.

SON: "Daddy, may I ask you a question?"

DAD: "Yeah sure, what it is?" replied the man.

SON: "Daddy, how much do you make an hour?"

DAD: "That's none of your business. Why do you ask such a thing?" The man said angrily.

SON: "I just want to know. Please tell me, how much do you make an hour?"

DAD: "If you must know, I make Rs.100 an hour."

SON: "Oh," the little boy replied, with his head down.

SON: "Daddy, may I please borrow Rs.50?"

The father was furious, "If the only reason you asked that is so you can borrow some money to buy a silly toy or some other nonsense, then you march yourself straight to your room and go to bed. Think about why you are being so selfish. I work hard everyday for such this childish behavior."

The little boy quietly went to his room and shut the door.

The man sat down and started to get even angrier about the little boy’s questions. How dare he ask such questions only to get some money?

After about an hour or so, the man had calmed down, and started to think: Maybe there was something he really needed to buy with that Rs.50 and he really didn't ask for money very often. The man went to the door of the little boy's room and opened the door.

"Are you asleep, son?" He asked.

"No daddy, I'm awake," replied the boy.

"I've been thinking, maybe I was too hard on you earlier" said the man.

"It's been a long day and I took out my aggravation on you... Here's the Rs.50 you asked for."

The little boy sat straight up, smiling. "Oh, thank you daddy!" He yelled.

Then, reaching under his pillow he pulled out some crumpled up bills.
The man saw that the boy already had money, started to get angry again. The little boy slowly counted out his money, and then looked up at his father.

"Why do you want more money if you already have some?" the father grumbled.

"Because I didn't have enough, but now I do," the little boy replied.

"Daddy, I have Rs.100 now. Can I buy an hour of your time?

Please come home early tomorrow. I would like to have dinner with you."

The father was crushed. He put his arms around his little son, and he begged for his forgiveness.

It's just a short reminder to all of you working so hard in life. We should not let time slip through our fingers without having spent some time with those who really matter to us, those close to our hearts.

Do remember to share that Rs.100 worth of your time with someone you love.

If we die tomorrow, the company that we are working for could easily replace us in a matter of days.

But the family and friends we leave behind will feel the loss for the rest of their lives. And come to think of it, we pour ourselves more into work than to our family
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A Letter To Ex- girlfriend...

Dear Monisha,

Thanks for being my love for one and half years, when you receive this letter I believe you might have selected a new boy friend and started enjoying your dating. Every lovers needs to struggle a bit to get a boy friend or girl friend.

Monisha … In order to recover your missing, I got another girl from next street & as you know this is my forth love from all my past experiences I have learned a lot.

When the love blossoms everyone starts writing love letters, you know very well… I have written many love letter to you , and writing a love letter in poetic way is not so easy nowadays MONISHA , and it's a time consuming work, In order to avoid all this I need all my lover letters back so that I can put corrector and send to my new girl friend , please send it back to me , I don't have poetic references or any photocopy of these letters.

Another thing MONISHA, I have given you one cute photo of mine , can you send it to me please , you know better that this is the only photo I look very cute & handsome and this photo I have taken when I was in my very first love.

And also, during my 1 ½ years of love days I have spend lot of monies for impressing you , I am attaching a list of expenses which I request you to clear it at the earliest.

The expenses are as follows: Lunch / Dinner ; 895, Cool Drinks 2938 Rs, Snacks 5645 Rs. , Juice 3845 Rs. , Cinema 1235Rs. Internet Chatting 1499 Rs. , Mobile 2546 Rs. Petrol 4255 Rs. Gift Items 7850 Rs, - Grand Total : 30,708 rs (in Words : Thrity Thousand Seven Hundred and Eight Rupees).

Please try to clear the above amount so that I can spend these monies on my new girl friend, and more over if you have any of my gift lying with you, am ready to take these packs in half prices. Please calculate the value of packs left over and deduct it from the above statement of account.

I am enclosing herewith your love letters (Weigh around 4 Kg) so that you no need to write again to your boy friend and your photo so that you can give to your new BF.


Also please advise your expenses which incurred during our dates, I don't think you have got any expenditure during these dates, I have seen many times that you always forget your purse when it comes to pay.

Anyway I hope you will clear the above outstanding at the earliest and wishing you a very wonderful 6th love affair with Subil.

Your Ex-lover ....

Thought Of The Day - 8th September 2009

Monday, September 7, 2009

Thoughts Especially For Guyz... Gals Just Enjoyy.. :) - [Fwd. By Kausar Sayed]


# Thought 1 #

When we are born, our mother's get the compliments and the flowers.

When we are married, our brides get the presents and the publicity.

When we die, our widows get the life insurance. What do women want to be liberated from?

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# Thought 2 #

The average man's life consists of :

Twenty years of having his mother ask him where he is going,

Forty years of having his wife ask the same question;
and at the end, the mourners wondering too.

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# Thought 3 #

A Man was walking down a street when he heard a voice from behind, "If you take one more step, a brick will fall down on your head and kill you."

The man stopped and a big brick fell right in front of him. The man was astonished.

He went on, and after a while he was going to cross the road.

Once again the voice shouted, "Stop! Stand still! If you take one more step a car will run over you, and you will die.

"The man did as he was instructed, just as a car came careening around the corner, barely missing him.

The man asked. "Who are you?"

"I am your guardian angel," the voice answered.

"Oh, yeah?" the man asked "And where the hell were you when I got married?"

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# Thought 4 #

Everyone in the wedding ceremony was watching the radiant bride as her father escorted her down the aisle to give away to groom.

They reached the altar and the waiting groom; the bride kissed her father and placed some thing in his hand.

Everyone in the room was wondering what was given to the father by bride.The father could feel the suspense in the air and all eyes were on him to divulge the secret and say something.

So he announced "Ladies and Gentlemen today is the luckiest day of my life." Then he raises his hands with what his daughter gave him and continued, "My daughter finally, finally returned my credit card to me."

The whole audience including priest started laughing but not the poor groom.

Thougt Of The Day - 7th September 2009


Chinese Call Centre!

Caller: Hello, can I speak to Annie Wan?

Operator: Yes, you can speak to me.

Caller: No, I want to speak to Annie Wan!

Operator: Yes I understand you want to speak to anyone. You can speak to me. Who is this?

Caller: I'm Sam Wan. And I need to talk to Annie Wan! It's urgent.

Operator: I know you are some one and you want to talk to anyone! But what's this urgent matter about?

Caller: Well... just tell my sister Annie Wan that our brother Noe Wan was involved in an accident. Noe Wan got injured and now Noe Wan is being sent to the hospital. Right now, Avery Wan is on his way to the hospital.

Operator: Look; if no one was injured and no one was sent to the hospital, then the accident isn't an urgent matter! You may find this hilarious but I don't have time for this!

Caller: You are so rude! Who are you?

Operator: I'm Saw Ree.

Caller: Yes! You should be sorry. Now give me your name!!

Operator: That's what I said. I'm Saw Ree ...

When A Lizard Can Do It, Why Can't We Do It

This is a true story that happened in Japan.In order to renovate the house, someone in Japan breaks open the wall.

Japanese houses normally have a hollow space between the wooden walls. When tearing down the walls, he found that there was a lizard stuck there because a nail from outside hammered into one of its feet. He sees this, feels pity, and at the same time curious, as when he checked the nail, it was nailed 10 years ago when the house was first built!

What happened?

The lizard has survived in such position for 10 years! In a dark wall partition for 10 years without moving, it is impossible and mind-boggling. Then he wondered how this lizard survived for 10 years without moving a single step! Since its foot was nailed!

So he stopped his work and observed the lizard, what it has been doing, and what and how it has been eating. Later, not knowing from where it came, appears another lizard, with food in its mouth. Ah! He was stunned and touched deeply. For the lizard that was stuck by nail, another lizard has been feeding it for the past 10 years...

Imagine? it has been doing that untiringly for 10 long years, without giving up hope on its partner.

Think, will u do that to your partner?

Imagine what a small creature can do that a creature blessed with a brilliant mind can't.

As information and communication technology advances, our access to information becomes faster and faster. But the distance between human beings . . .is it getting closer as well? As for now, I don't think we can do this for 10 mins even.....

Never Say you are Busy When They Really Need You..

You May Have The Entire World At Your Feet.

But You Might Be The Only World To Them.

A Moment of negligence might break the very heart which loves you through all odds..

Before you say something just remember. It takes a moment to Break but an entire life to make…

To Live Use Heart And to Survive use Brains.

Please never abandon your loved ones.

Sunday, September 6, 2009

A Beautiful Story

A long time ago, before the world was created and humans set foot on it, God had put all the human "qualities" in a separate room. Since all thequalities were bored they decided to play hide & seek.

"Madness" was one of the qualities and he shouted: "I want to count, I want to count!" And since nobody was crazy enough to want to seek "Madness", all the other qualities agreed. So "Madness" leaned against a tree and started to count:One, two, three..."

As "Madness" counted, the qualities went hiding. "Treasure" hid in a pile of garbage.. "Lie " said that it would hide under a stone, but hid at the bottom of the lake. And Madness continued to count "... seventy nine, eighty, eighty one..."By this time, all the qualities were already hidden-except "Love ".

For stupid as "Love " is, he could not decide where to hide.

And this should not surprise us, because we all know how difficult it is to hide "Love".

"Madness": "...ninety five, ninety six, ninety seven..."Just when "Madness" got to one hundred..... ...."Love"jumped into a rose bush where he hid.

And Madness turned around and shouted: "I'm coming, I'm coming!" As Madness turned around, "Laziness" was the first to be found, because "Laziness" was too lazy to hide. "Madness"searched madly and found "Lie" at the bottom of the lake. One by one,Madness found them all - except Love. Madness was getting desperate, unable to find Love.

Envious of Love, "Envy" whispered to "Madness ": "You only need to find Love, and Love is hiding in the rose bush."

"Madness" Jumped on the rose bush and he heard loud cry. The thorns in the bush had pierced "Loves" eyes.

Hearing the commotion God came into the room and saw what had happened. He got very angry and cursed "Madness" and said since "Love" has become blind because of u... ..u shall always be with him"

And so it came about that from that day on, Love is blind and is always accompanied by Madness.!

A Wonderful Story

A woman came out of her house and saw 3 old men with long white beards sitting in her front yard. She did not recognize them. She said “I don’t think I know you, but you must be hungry. Please come in and have something to eat.”

“Is the man of the house home?” they asked.

“No”, she replied, “He’s out.”

“Then we cannot come in”, they replied.

In the evening when her husband came home, she told him what had happened.

“Go tell them I am home and invite them in.”

The women went out and invited the men in.

“We do not go into a House together,” they replied.

“Why is that?” she asked.

One of the old men explained. “His name is Wealth,” he said pointing to one of his friends, and said pointing to another one, “He is Success and I am Love.” “Now go in and discuss with your husband which one of us you want in your home.”


The women went in and told her husband what was said. Her husband was overjoyed. “How nice!!”, he said. Since that is the case, let us invite Wealth. Let him come and fill our home with wealth!”.

His wife disagreed. “My dear, why don’t we invite Success?”

Their daughter was listening from the other corner of the house. She jumped in with her own suggestion. “Would it not be better to invite Love? Our home will then be filled with love!”

“Let us head our daughter’s advice,” said the husband to his wife.

“Go out and invite Love to be our guest.”

The woman went out and asked the 3 old men, “Which one of you is Love? Please come in and be our guest.”

Love got up and started walking towards the house. The other two also got up and followed him. Surprised, the lady asked Wealth and Success: “I only invited Love, why are you coming in?”

The old men replied together, “If you had invited Wealth or Success, the other two of us would have stayed out, but since you invited Love, wherever HE goes, we go with him. Wherever there is Love, there is also Wealth and Success!!!!!"

How Friendship Breaks?

Both Friends Will Think The Other Is Busy

And Will Not Contact Thinking It May Be Disturbing

As Time Passes

Both Will Think Let The OTher Contact
After That each Will Think Why I Should Contact First ?

Here Your Love Will Be Converted To Hate

Finally Without Contact The Memory Becomes Weak They Forget Each Other.

So Keep In Touch With All And Pass This TO All Your Friends...
I Don't Want To be One Of This Kind.

So Here I Am waiting your kind response

Please keep in touch.
Wishing you All blessings of life.